My Menopause Story- Liz Hornby
Hi, I’m Liz and I was diagnosed with perimenopause at the age of 43. I always assumed that I would go through menopause like my mum, who had no problems at the age of 50. However, I was in for a surprise.
I was going through a lot at the time, moving houses and getting my son with special needs settled into a new school. So, when I found out about my diagnosis, it hit me hard. I felt like a chapter in my life was closing, and it was out of my control.
I started taking hormone replacement therapy (HRT) immediately, but after just 6 weeks, I realised it was making me feel sick all day, every day. So, I decided to stop taking it and explore other options. My doctor recommended trying different types of HRT, but I didn’t want to go through the trial-and-error process. He did, however, put me on high doses of calcium.
Something the doctor said that stuck with me was that knowledge of menopause is still new because it was unheard of until, relatively, recently. Mortality rates in women before menopause were high, so research on it started late, this and Women’s problems not being discussed openly either.
Once I’d come off the HRT hot flushes became a regular occurrence, and I learned to dress in layers to manage the temperature changes. Mood swings were also a challenge, and there were days when I felt like strangling anyone who crossed me, my family learned to give me space on those days.
One advantage of going through menopause at a young age was that I qualified for free bone density scans, which helped me track my calcium levels.
Unfortunately, my husband was made redundant twice during this time, which added extra stress to our lives. I struggled with low mood, and without a support network in place, it was challenging. Looking back, I wish I had sought more support from friends.
I sometimes wonder if I should have tried different types of HRT, but overall, I don’t regret my decision. I do wish I had explored more complementary remedies, like Black Cohosh, which some women find helpful. I’ve recently found a Facebook group called UK Ladies Menopause Support Group which has helped, because I’d noticed that having put on a stone in weight during lockdown, my hot flushes came back and wanted to know if I was alone in that — I can report that I wasn’t alone!
I believe more education and awareness about menopause is needed. It’s important to break the stigma and educate both men and women about the possible symptoms and challenges. Every woman’s experience is different, so it’s crucial to provide support and understanding to those who need it.
Since my diagnosis, I’ve noticed that there is more information and understanding about menopause in recent years. There is also legal support for women who may need accommodations at work. Educating men, employers, and managers is key to ensuring that women going through menopause receive the support they need.
Despite the challenges, my husband and I are still together after 37 years of marriage. Going through menopause has made me a calmer person, and I believe that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. I’m grateful for the support and understanding of my loved ones throughout this journey.
Here at Buckinghamshire Council, our commitment to work-life balance and adapting ways of working shapes our working lives for the better. Employees have access to our support group the Menopause@work and ongoing menopause guidance. The Menopause@work is a safe space for employees to share their experiences or listen to speakers covering subjects such as HRT, the benefits of hypnotherapy, and personal experiences.
For more information about working at Buckinghamshire visit our website here: https://jobs.buckinghamshire.gov.uk/
